Demi Moore, Tilda Swinton and Sam Taylor-Wood are all fans of the toyboy.
Now a study has showed that women who date, or are married to younger men consider themselves younger at heart than those who spend their time with an older man.
The survey of 1,000 women found that having a toyboy can make a woman feel an average of four years younger than they actually are.
It revealed that women with younger partners have a tendency to enjoy more outdoor activities and mix with people who have more youthful hobbies.
Most said that their partner made them feel four years younger, but one in ten claimed that having a toyboy knocked ten years off their age.
More than half said that their partner’s energy had rubbed off on them and 27 per cent said that they visit pubs and nightclubs more with a younger man.
Three in ten admitted that they make an effort to dress younger, and a sixth said they over-compensate for their age by trying harder to keep the relationship fresh and exciting.
A spokesman for dating site Toyboy.com, which carried out the research, said that U.S. television show Cougar Town, which stars Courtney Cox, had sparked a 102 per cent increase in membership.
‘That is the largest increase we’ve seen in the ten years since we launched and it shows women are no longer secretive about their preferences for a younger man,’ he said.
‘An increase in high profile toyboy relationships like Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher has also helped.
‘It’s always been believed having a younger man makes you feel younger and now we have proven this is true.
‘Whether it means going out more, dressing differently or trying new things they wouldn’t normally have done, it does seem having a younger man is the answer.’
The survey also showed that the greater the age gap, the happier a woman is likely to be.
Thirty-six per cent of those polled said that older men are more set in their ways, grumpy (27 per cent) and serious (22 per cent), while one in five believe that they are more boring and likely to be out of shape.
They claimed that younger partners, on the other hand, are more likely to make them laugh, and have a more relaxed attitude to life. But they admitted that older men were more chivalrous and trustworthy.
Of those who were previously in a relationship with an older man, one in six admitted to being on the lookout for someone younger.
But three in ten women said that they would not trust a younger man not to leave them for a girl his own age.
When Lola-Rose Curtis was forced to quit her job in the cut-throat world of recruitment because of a stress related breakdown she didn’t work for seven months.
Facing an unpaid rent bill the 27-year old, from Windsor, Berkshire, was prepared to try a new career.
She had discovered a friend was working as a ‘cam girl’ and, encouraged by her sister, decided to give it go and hasn’t looked back.
She has now been a cam girl for several months and earns hundreds of pounds each day for a few hours’ work talking online to men about their sexual fantasies and sometimes taking her clothes off or using sex toys.
She said: “I used to have low self-confidence and body insecurities but since taking up camming my self-esteem has rocketed.
“What I used to see as imperfections are loved by my viewers. I believe that women should be entitled to do exactly as they please with their bodies without having to fear criticism.
“My job is a bit like being a therapist and while sexual fantasies are a big part of camming I can spend hours simply discussing their day.”
Lola took time out to answer some of the Mirror’s questions about her life as a camgirl.
What does a cam girl do?
A cam girl will be online and visible to others through a webcam that also has a chat room to communicate via typing or audio.
You will be able to chat in a group session with the cam girl, or you can go to a private room where it will be one-to-one.
You will be charged per minute to chat – talking in private costs more.
I charge £2 a minute to chat to me in a group where men or women can see me fully-dressed (well, something slightly provocative but no nudity) and I charge £3 a minute to talk to me on a one-to-one basis.
The cam girl is there for you to talk to… whether it be about your day at work, your plans at the weekend… or you could talk about your deepest fantasies and then it goes from there.
A cam girl will also have a profile which will tell you all about them, you can gauge what experience you will have from this profile.
Is it just talk or is there a physical element? Do you stay fully clothed?
In private I do take my clothes off, or I may be dressed in a requested outfit… PVC is the most popular and usually requested by someone who likes domination or humiliation.
It’s something I had to get used to as I’m a super nice person. Being mean to someone because they enjoy it is a hard one to crack.
I own several outfits and several toys that I use during private shows. A guy tends to spend an hour on average in private chat and we talk about all the things they would like to do.
Public sex is the most common, getting up to no good in bars etc.
I usually listen to them and then, to put it crudely, act out what they are telling me to do to myself.
Are there any extreme behaviours you have witnessed?
I have chatted to men who think it’s okay to be extremely demanding, rude and, perhaps some would say, aggressive in the chat.
I politely tell them that I will not tolerate it and I kick them out so they cannot return to the cam.
They will often email through the website begging to be allowed back into the chat.
I think they believe we NEED their business… there are plenty of respectable guys and girls looking to cam. Us cam girls can be very choosy and you have to be strong in this job, you do not have to do anything you feel uncomfortable with. You are your own boss.
What is your average day?
My average day will consist of me logging on for 9-10am. I will update my profile, keeping it relevant, and I will make sure it’s visible on the front page of the website.
I am a performer, it’s my job to provide a sensual virtual experience to who I’m talking to. I want the person to connect with me and feel as if they are in the room.
I will spend the day logged on answering calls from various people with various desires.
I usually clock off when I’ve hit my goal (between £700-£1000) around 4pm when I resume my usual day.
I like to keep my alter ego separate from real life.
She’s feisty, sexy and seductive whereas I’m bubbly, laid back and enjoy slobbing on the sofa watching box sets.
How did you get into being a cam girl?
I was first introduced to webcam when me and a friend stumbled across an older friend’s social media which showed she was openly caming. I never dreamt that I would have the guts to start it myself.
However after a work-related breakdown and being diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression, which meant leaving my job, I thought: ‘what’s a girl to lose’.
I hadn’t worked in seven months and my rent was due. I came across On The Record models on Instagram and within 24 hours my profile was live.
What did you do before?
I have worked in healthcare for 10 years and my last role was a Recruitment Co-Ordinator
How much do you earn?
On my first day I made £1,700 and on a good day I can make £700 in around 4 hours… I aim to make around £150k in a year.
Do you only work late at night?
No, actually I have recently slipped into working 9-5. Perhaps it’s embedded in me from my years of working in an office!
If I make plans in the day, I will come home and work at night. However, early mornings are usually very busy.
Most of the guys I speak to work from home, or are uni students or are on different time zones.. I’ve been invited all over the world.
I have a few regulars who cam with me from their office while they are ‘working’.
What do friends and family think of your job?
My friends find what I do refreshing. They will ask me about my day at work with genuine interest.
My family completely support me, it was in fact my sister who encouraged me to start camming as she thought I’d be great at it.
How does it affect your relationships?
I am single at the moment. However, the last guy I was seeing did know about camming.
He said that he was fine with it but we broke up shortly after I told him.
I do believe he had an issue with it. We had a fun relationship before he knew.
I would send him racy pictures and he would love it.
After he found out, he would brush them off as if to say… it’s not all for me.
What has the money allowed you to do?
The earning power is unlimited.
I spent Christmas at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in New York and am able to holiday when I like. I’m going to Amsterdam next month and for some winter sun.
I have now paid my rent up front for the next year as well as saving for a mortgage for my own place.
I do enjoy trips to London to stock up on designer clothes too.
How do you keep yourself in shape and looking good?
I’m successful on cam thanks to my curves. I used to feel conscious that I wasn’t a size 8. I’ve been dieting all my life… now I make money from being a size 12-14 and men go weak for my curves.
It’s allowed me to accept myself but I eat well and I walk everywhere.
What kinds of fans do you have and what kind of things do you get asked?
I talk to so many different kinds of people.
I speak to a famous Rugby player regularly, business men, extremely attractive young men and older women who are into domination.
The most common thing I have been asked is if I will go on a date with the person I am talking to.
I keep it strictly work.
I’ve had two men tell me they love me – interestingly both were married.
Do you have any “red lines” when it comes to private chat? Have you had to end calls or break off?
There are standard red tape rules – no talk of under age sex, rape or animals.
I have one guy say he enjoyed role play and asked me to be ‘younger’ but didn’t state how young.
I didn’t get a good vibe from his so I cut the chat. Looking at it now I should have asked more.
If he is in his 50s then being younger could be 20 plus. I’ve had a chat in role play who was very aggressive to women and wanted to talk about the violent acts he would do to me. Again, I stopped the chat.
Are you ever recognised? Do you have to be careful about personal details you give out?
I’ve been recognised once! A guy who worked behind a bar in a restaurant in Surrey was trying to work out where he knew me from. He went bright red and we both realised but did say anything else about it.
What has it taught you about men?
I believe that the men I speak to come to me because they either long for intimacy or they desire a more personal sexual experience than from, say, porn.
I do speak to a lot of married men and I respect that they are not cheating on their wives.
I do also speak to a lot of married men who are persistent in trying to meet me, a regular of mine has actually mentioned “love” and leaving his wife, we speak around five hours and he’s developed feelings.
This does put me off being in a relationship. I think we all have desires that we need to meet, I’m all for it as long as no one is hurt in the process.
Has it led to other opportunities?
I’ve been invited to very exclusive places through camming and I have been asked to model away from cam.
There was a chap on cam who was 78 years old, he emailed me to ask if he could pay me £3,000 a week if I would join him for dinner twice a week at his stately home.
I did decline, I keep it strictly cam.
Are you friends with other cam girls/boys?
I am indeed. Off the Record has an amazing group of women and men. We all chat in our WhatsApp group.
One of the girls and I are planning a cheeky week in the sun this October.
Where is the industry going next?
Snapchat and Instagram (fans only tab) are super popular.
I use Twitter to promote myself. Most girls use premium snap where you charge a monthly fee that people can be signed up to.. you then upload pics as you like.
How long do you plan on doing this for?
I couldn’t see myself doing anything else. Once you start, it becomes very addictive. Not just the money, but the confidence you gain from camming rockets continually.
Most women would run for the hills if they found out their new boyfriend was a serial cheat.
But when Terri Ellwood discovered her date had been unfaithful to his ex-wife more than ten times, she had a very different reaction.
Lee Blackley told her the only way he could remain “faithful” would be if she allowed him to sleep with other women.
Desperate to make a go of it, Terri AGREED — and promised to be there while he did it.
Now the pair both regularly sleep with other couples and, as they prepare to tie the knot this year, the bride-to-be admits becoming a swinger was the only way to save her relationship.
Terri, 26, says: “I love it now but at first I wasn’t so sure.
“I really liked Lee and was devastated when I found out he’d cheated on every past partner.
“I didn’t want to end things and I knew he liked me too.
“He asked if I could come round to the idea of swinging.
“I thought it was just for weird older couples but when he showed me all the attractive young couples on swinging websites, I thought I should give it a go.
“Now I’m happily a swinger with Lee, and I’m safe in the knowledge he’ll never cheat — unless I’m in the room.”
Terri, from Lowestoft, Suffolk, first met engineer Lee in February 2015 after joining dating site Plenty of Fish.
The two hit it off and just four weeks later, met for their first date.
Terri, a retail worker, thought she had found the man of her dreams, until Lee, 30, made a shock confession.
She says: “We had been talking until the early hours and getting on so well, then Lee just blurted it out.
“He told me he had never been able to be faithful to any girlfriends, and even admitted having a secret ‘cheating’ phone to organise his late-night hook-ups.
“I was gobsmacked. Lee was adamant he wanted to stay with me but admitted he struggled to remain faithful, sexually, due to such a strong desire to sleep with other women. I doubted how we could ever make this work.”
Despite Lee’s confession, Terri gave him a chance and the pair made their relationship official in April 2015.
SWINGING: WHAT IS IT?
Practice of engaging in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners within a group, especially on a habitual basis.
But six months later, Lee called Terri with a very surprising offer.
She recalls: “Lee said he wanted to be with me but asked if we could bring someone else into the bedroom for a threesome. It was totally out of the blue.
“I wanted Lee to be happy and I’d always been open-minded but the idea of being with someone else made me nervous. Lee was really patient and understanding.
“We discussed it for hours, how it would work, who it would be with. I ended up being intrigued by the idea.”
The following night, Lee showed Terri a swinging website where they could find a potential third person to join them.
She says: “I really enjoyed looking at the different women with Lee and when we both found one of them attractive, I was actually excited to message her.
“She wrote back saying she was interested and I knew I wanted to try it.”
Two weeks later they met her in a hotel, with Terri feeling “terrified” Lee would “like her more than me”.
She adds: “But as soon as I met her, I felt at ease. After chatting and flirting a bit we started to become intimate in the bedroom.
“It was such a thrill when Lee watched me with her, and I really enjoyed watching Lee too.
“When we went home Lee and I sat up for hours talking about it — what we liked and what we didn’t.”
Despite it being their first time, Lee was keen to introduce more people to their relationship.
She says: “We signed up to swingers websites to meet other couples and a few months later, we had our first foursome. It was just as thrilling as the first time.
“We now meet couples a lot more as we find it more enjoyable — and with another couple, there is more fun for everyone.”
Terri and Lee attend swinging parties every six weeks, always using protection — although it takes a lot of planning to find someone to share their bed.
Terri says: “Most of it is done online. We choose together.
“If one of us doesn’t fancy them then we have a rule where we can veto them.
“You don’t just go to a party and that’s it. When you meet couples you message each other and have a social meet beforehand to warm up to the main event — just like dating.
“We have a few regular couples we meet at hotels.
“It took a while to get used to sex parties.
“At first we just watched but now we are getting more involved and I love it. I’m a totally different person when I’m there.
“So far we’ve been with just over ten different couples between us, and we’ve swung everywhere — hotels, houses and even a caravan.”
Despite Terri and Lee’s free attitude to partner sharing, they have a set of rules they both must abide by.
She says: “When it comes to sex, we do everything together: that’s the most important rule.
“We never meet anyone on our own and we always message as a couple.
“It’s important that he respects me.
“I never thought I’d be OK with seeing my boyfriend have sex with another woman, let alone be comfortable with him seeing me sleep with another man. It’s centred around trust.
“I would not be OK with Lee meeting someone on his own. I would consider that cheating.”
Other stipulations include no kissing and the couple are only allowed to swing away from their home.
Terri says: “I made the rule early on that kissing isn’t allowed — and we never meet anyone in our home.
“Our bedroom is sacred to me. I don’t mix swinging but our private relationship is in our house.
“Sex with just the two of us is still the most important thing to me. It’s vital to have your own intimate relationship alongside swinging.”
Facts and figures
Two million people in the UK swap partners to spice up their sex lives
60% of swingers say swinging has been beneficial to their relationship
Clubs, holidays & websites are available for swingers to set up partner swapping
10% of swingers have an STI
Now, more than two years after Lee’s cheating bombshell, the couple are happier than ever.
Lee has no intention of straying — in fact, they are planning their wedding for October.
Terri says: “I’ve never been more in love. I sometimes get jealous and worry other women are better than me, or more attractive.
“But Lee is quick to reassure me that I’m the one he loves. I can’t wait to tie the knot — but it’ll definitely be just the two of us on our wedding night.
“I love sharing my man with other women but now I know it’s me taking him home.”
Lee says: “When I first met Terri, I knew she was the one for me.
“I could have kept on lying to her but I knew that if I was dishonest, it would all come out in the end.
“I know cheating doesn’t get you anywhere but in a bog-standard relationship I’m always looking at ways of making it exciting.
A Glasgow adult nightclub has vowed to continue its sex parties despite fears of the coronavirus.
CJ’s in Glasgow has limited its capacity to less than 100 revellers
each night in an effort to combat the spread of the virus, which has so
far infected 31 people in Glasgow.
The club promises ‘a fun enjoyable night out in safe and comfortable surroundings with a relaxed atmosphere’.
They say events scheduled this weekend and throughout next week will go ahead.
And bosses have reassured regulars that measures have been put in
place to reduce any potential risks, including placing hand sanitizer
dispensers at different locations within the venue.
A statement on a sex site from the club’s owners reads: “CJs parties
will still be going ahead and extra measures have been put in place to
reduce any risks.
“Hand sanitiser dispensers have been placed on the wall at the
entrance outside the cloakroom, at the top of the stairs before you
enter playrooms and in the kitchen area.
“We are asking guests to please make use of these along with washing your hands before and after play.
“We will be restricting parties to less than 100 guests until further notice. Swing safe as always.”
My husband and I used to play a game of naming movie stars we would like to sleep with. Eventually, that game transformed to discussing people we know who we’d like to sleep with. Although we didn’t start giving each other permission to actually have sex with these people, the idea was planted.
I didn’t start my marriage as a swinger. I was married for more than a decade before we first couple swapped.
The next couple of years were spent with things I’d call testers. At parties we played the game, “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” From there we started experiencing sex with someone watching. All these things may seem tame to most, but to us it was the beginning of a lifestyle we didn’t know we wanted.
We became members of a webcam site called anywebcam. The site allowed us to be voyeurs, which in turn led to us having sex on the webcam. We spent time chatting with other couples and eventually decided to meet a group of people from the website. We took a trip to Tennessee to attend a party with this group, who were friends that regularly got together and played.
For this group, playtime consisted of girl-on-girl while the men watched. One couple secretly told us they were a full swap couple, but that type of play didn’t normally occur with this group.
Enter Soccer Mom; blonde, skinny, and tan; arriving with no preconceived notions. I seemed to transform the group, at least for one evening.
The parties theme was toga. So while my husband was off with a few of the boys buying more alcohol, I was standing in a thong having people dress me in a toga. This was the beginning of loosening up the rules for everyone. The evening moved along with some kissing and a little touching. Before I knew it I was getting quite a bit of attention. Picture this: me on the couch with a man kissing my lips, kissing each of my breasts, and a female between my legs. Each would alternate positions. The guys and girls would gesture for an ok from my husband before they joined the fun. A female saw that my husband was standing alone so she offered to take care of him.
Later that night we experienced our first swap with another couple. We went back to our hotel room with the other couple. Each of us started having sex with our own spouses. Not long after the guys looked at each other for a permissive nod, then we traded. This was a thrilling experience for both of us. From that night on we knew this was something we wanted to experience again and again.
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